Moonshot Desire Read online

  Moonshot Desire

  A Defying Expectations Novel

  McKenna Rogue

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Epilogue

  Dear Reader

  Also by McKenna Rogue

  1

  Matt

  The locker room buzzed with amped-up excitement as the Anaheim Angels practiced their pre-game rituals for the fourth, and hopefully, last game of the World Series. One guy sat in the middle of the floor meditating. Another guy rolled on a pair of socks I was pretty sure he’d worn the previous three games. Made me curl my lip; they were probably rank as hell. Another guy was praying. They planned to end the series with a shutout and a championship.

  Derrick, my best friend, client, second basemen, hotshot, and team captain bounced from foot to foot. He kissed the pendant of Saint Sebastian, the patron saint for athletes, removed it from around his neck, and hung it in his locker.

  I’d discovered Derrick Moyer buried in a Class A league in Burlington, Iowa. He was the first talent I found on my own and I couldn’t believe the second baseman had been so overlooked. Once I got my hands on him and a contract in place, he played in the Triple-A minor league in Salt Lake City, Utah. He was a Salt Lake Bee for about half a minute. The Anaheim Angels picked him up and two years later he was a starter. The twenty-four-year-old, a five-tool player, became a leader of the team and the Angels fought hard to keep him. He was strong on defense and offense. He was the first player I signed as a sports agent and he became my best friend in the process.

  Standing in the locker room with him now, just hours before he could have clinched his first World Series ring, nearly ten years after I discovered him, was a surreal highlight of my career and my life.

  “You look more nervous than me,” Derrick said.

  I chuckled. “Well only one of us gets to play out there. I have to sit and watch. That’s worse.”

  “Oh sure, no stress down there on the field with millions of fans watching in the stadium and on television,” Derrick said.

  I grinned and side-eyed him. I knew how to light a competitive fire in his spirit. “You’re not getting any younger. This may be your last chance to win that title.”

  Derrick punched my chest. “Don’t call me old, ass. I’ve got a thousand more games in me.”

  I didn’t like the serious note of his baritone voice. Derrick was two months younger than my thirty-three. Unlike most baseball players, he wasn’t married but he did have a daughter. She was five and his pride and joy. In the last year, Derrick had really worked to spend time with her and not put his career first so much. Incidentally, he’d also played the best season of his life. It helped that the Angels had a stellar team, but Derrick would be a free agent next year, and with the year he just had, there might be a bidding war.

  “I would never doubt you,” I said quietly. “Where’s Summer today?”

  “She’s sitting with her mom. You’ll see her when you go to your seat,” he said.

  “Whoa, you got Holly to come to a game?”

  “Holly and I have mended what we could. She’s been a good friend the last few months,” he said.

  “Derrick, what’s going on with you?” This wasn’t the first time I’d asked this question. He’d been acting weird for a while now. He and Holly in the stadium together without bringing it down to rubble and carnage was a miracle all on its own.

  He just smiled. “Nothing, man. Life is good.”

  It was then I noticed the gray hair at his temples. He was a sandy blond, and rarely did I pay attention to the color of his hair, but I noted it today. And the dark circles under his eyes. It was more than just exhaustion that loomed in his blue eyes.

  As soon as this season was over, I would make him take it easy and have him checked over. The works. I knew the trainer would tell me if something was up, and Derrick was too smart to play hurt, but that didn’t ease the unsettled surety something wasn’t right.

  “Speaking of life, man, you ever hook up with that Hayley chick?”

  My brow furrowed. It took my brain a second to downshift to the new topic. Hayley Martin rarely came up when we talked. “What are you talking about?”

  “Come on. You’ve been about your career the entire time I’ve known you. You’ve never seriously dated anyone. You’re devoted to your clients and your family. But what about you, man? When are you going to start your life? I don’t mean your career.”

  I blinked at him. “Where the hell is this coming from? Did you watch Ellen again or something?”

  “Just take it from me, don’t let your life become just about your job. You don’t want to get to the end of your life and have nothing but a daughter you should’ve been a better father to and her mother, who you knew you could love, but weren’t a decent enough guy to do it.”

  “Derrick, seriously, what’s going on?”

  “Stop and smell the roses. That’s what’s going on, Matthew. Go and have an adventure. Go and find Hayley and make love to her on the beach, get sand in places you’ve never dreamed of, and enjoy your fucking life. Otherwise, what’s the point?”

  Just as I opened my mouth to respond, the manager walked into the room and gathered the team to give a pep talk before they went out there for “The Star-Spangled Banner”.

  “I’ll see you out there, Derrick. Have a good game.”

  I held my fist out for an obligatory fist bump but instead, Derrick pulled me into his arms and gave me a bear hug.

  “Moyer, you and your boyfriend done, or do you need a minute?” the manager barked.

  Derrick turned and headed for the rest of the team. I watched him a moment before making my way to my seat.

  The interaction with Derrick had my brain churning up all kinds of thoughts. Hayley Martin had been my childhood best friend. We’d grown up in Los Angeles together—well, Beverly Hills. I was the son of two prominent A-list actors, and she was a child actress well-known for her hit television show. Neither of us was impressed with fame and fortune; it was just part of our lifestyle.

  Hayley was an only child though, while I was the oldest of seven at the time I met her. The grand total ended up being thirteen. Hayley loved the chaos of our family and when we moved away, she was crushed. I was too. We promised to keep in touch, and we did. We saw each other a few times through the following seventeen years but it had been a solid five years since I’d seen her last. It wasn’t abnormal and aside from Derrick, she was still my closest friend.

  Her parents enjoyed living off the money she made as a child actress and hadn’t let her quit before she turned eighteen and had power over her own life. Once she was old enough to move out, she left show business behind and went to college. She switched majors six times and went to school for seven years before she graduated with a degree in marine biology. After a couple of years of disappointing work stateside, she moved to Mexico.

  We emailed each other about once a month—in fact, it was my turn to write her back. But there had never been anything romantic between us. I wasn’t sure why Derrick suggested there should be.

  Then again, everything Derrick had said and done in the last five minutes of our conversation struck me as weird. When the hell had he and Holly become friends? I shouldn’t have been, but I was still surprised to see her sitting in the seat next to mine with Summer.

  I sat down next to Holly and smiled. “Hi.”

  “Hi, Matt. How are you?”

  “I’m good. How about you?”

  She managed a smile. She had the same dark circles under her eyes Derrick had but she just looked tired. “I’m doing okay.”

  I looked around her and saw the cherub-faced Summer with her blonde curls and bright green eyes, that, despite their color, looked like her father’s. “Hi, Summer.”

  “Hi, Uncle Matt.” She hopped off the seat and leaped into my arms.

  “Summer!” Holly scolded.

  “It’s okay. She usually sits in my lap at games,” I said. “I’ve got twelve siblings. I’m used to being jumped on.”

  Holly’s eyes widened. “Twelve. Wow. Your mom must be exhausted. One five-year-old is all I can handle.”

  I chuckled. “My mom and dad love kids and apparently couldn’t stop themselves from adopting or keeping their hands off each other.”

  Holly chuckled. “That sounds sweet.”

  “It’s especially sweet when you’re the one they all call when there’s a crisis,” I replied.

  “Are you the oldest?”

  I nodded.

  “Wow.”

  We stood for “The Star-Spangled Banner” and the game launched into action.

  After the seventh inning stretch, the bases were loaded and Derrick was up to bat. Summer stood in front of me leaning on the railing. We were seated right behind the dugout. I watched Derrick as he d
id his routine swinging at the air with a weight on the bat. He always swung five times. I leaned forward, sitting on the edge of my seat. Holly was biting her thumbnail, looking nervous.

  The first pitch slapped the inside of the catcher’s glove for a strike. The second pitch was a foul ball. Three more foul balls followed. And then the sound of the hit filled the stadium as the ball soared upward and through the heart of centerfield.

  It was going…

  Going…

  Gone!

  Grand Slam!

  Derrick ran to first and kept going.

  One run.

  Two runs.

  Derrick rounded second base.

  Three runs.

  And then Derrick headed home.

  He stumbled once.

  I was already on my feet with Summer on my shoulders so she could see. Holly gasped as Derrick stumbled again. He lost his footing and toppled over at home plate.

  All the players huddled around him as the trainer ran out with the manager behind.

  “Daddy!” Summer cried.

  I pulled her down from my shoulders and handed her to Holly.

  The trainer loaded him onto a cart, and they carried him off the field.

  I didn’t remember leaving my seat or breaking into a run but the next thing I knew, I stood outside the ambulance demanding I go with him.

  I texted Holly to let her know which hospital. I texted the manager to make sure someone took care of Holly and Summer.

  Derrick’s skin was ashen, and his cheeks looked sunken. When had he lost weight? How did I miss it?

  “What’s wrong with him?” I demanded.

  The trainer blinked at me. “You don’t know?”

  “No.”

  “He was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor,” he said.

  “When?”

  “Seven months ago. He said he wanted to go down swinging.”

  The anger boiling inside me pressed into my limbs and I squeezed it all into my fists, turning my knuckles white. Why didn’t he tell me? Is that what Holly knew and wasn’t saying? I thought about all the time he’d been making for Summer and his weird stop-and-smell-the-roses rant. He knew he was dying.

  The son of an asshole knew he was dying. And he didn’t tell me.

  I looked down at my friend. He was still unconscious. The EMTs took his vitals and monitored him. He barely looked like he was breathing.

  “He isn’t going to make it, is he?” I said.

  The trainer didn’t answer me. He looked somber.

  Tears stung my eyes, but I held my breath until the burning ceased and I knew no tears would fall.

  The Angels won the World Series and my friend died. Looked like he’d always be playing with the angels.

  2

  Hayley

  Stars popped out slowly as the sun sank to the horizon beyond the ocean. I sipped white wine from a delicate glass. Spencer had gone all out for our date. He was a trust fund guy with all the time in the world. He’d taken my tour of bull sharks breeding and coral reefs a couple of months ago and had been courting me ever since.

  It was fun. Spencer was fun. He wasn’t afraid to go on adventures. He liked to eat things neither of us had tried before. He was probably an adrenaline junky, but it was all good fun to me.

  He’d insisted on a big evening with wining and dining and later there would be the romantic boat ride under the stars. And probably a hot romp either on deck or in the cabin.

  The alcohol had chased away the chill of the evening for now, but I’d need to layer up soon. I’d worn a dress that was supposed to steer Spencer’s mind more toward taking my clothes off than being romantic, to no avail. How much longer could he look into my eyes and whisper sweet nothings into my ear? I wasn’t here to fall in love; I was having a good time.

  I wasn’t my mother, who fell in love and married every man she spent any time with, every man who showed the least bit of interest. That would never be me. I didn’t need a man to define myself as happy. I was happy.

  “These last couple of months have been amazing, Hayley,” Spencer said.

  I smiled politely, not wanting to encourage more than necessary. For some reason, guys always got more involved in the relationship than I did. I had no interest in long-term relationships. That’s why Spencer was so perfect. He’d get bored and eventually, he’d be ready to sail on and find his next harbor and his next honey. I was simply a port to visit and get his rocks off.

  “And I don’t want them to end.”

  Uh-oh. That wasn’t good. “All good things must come to an end.”

  Spencer set his drink down and stood. “Hayley, I know you’re like me. You don’t have any roots and you have no intention of settling down. But I can tell there is more here than just some summer fling. We both know we would settle down for the right person and plant some roots.”

  I set my glass down too. “Spencer, this is nothing but a summer fling, even in October.”

  Spencer didn’t seem to hear me, or maybe he didn’t want to. He knelt next to me and reached into his pocket.

  Oh, God. Oh, God. Not again.

  “Hayley Martin…”

  I bolted out of my seat. “Spencer, please don’t.”

  He held out the ring in the velvet box. “Marry me, Hayley. We’ll sail around the world. You’ll want for nothing.”

  “Yes, I will. I’ll want for my life here, unattached, just as I like it.” I slipped away from the table and away from him. I tried not to look at the giant diamond ring glinting in the moonlight, rivaling the stars in the sky unhindered by light pollution. A diamond wasn’t something I desired, unless you were talking about a baseball diamond. The gem blinked at me like a star trying to buy my affection, making me completely uncomfortable.

  “You’re scared. You’re afraid I won’t want you after a while.”

  “Spencer, stop and listen to me. I don’t love you. I don’t want to sail away with you. In fact, I think it’s time for us to stop seeing each other. I didn’t realize you’d gotten so attached. This was supposed to be fun. We agreed on that.”

  Spencer stood up and snapped the velvet box closed. “Why? Do you really think you could do better than me?”

  Great. Now came the insulting part of the evening. Spencer was butthurt and since it wasn’t him, it had to be me. Because who was crazy enough to give up wealth and being at the beck and call of someone who owned a small boat? That crazy bitch was me.

  “Spencer, it’s not about doing better than you. I’m not interested in marriage or commitment. I like my life. I don’t want to move or change it unless I decide that’s what I want down the road. But I like it here. I like exactly where I am. I like my one-bedroom bungalow. I like being single and playing the field. I told you all of this when we started to fuck around.”

  The truth was, I was burned-out showing tourists around all the time. Even the sharks had lost their pizzazz. But I wasn’t ready to move on yet and I certainly wasn’t going to move on because of some guy who thought he was entitled to me. I didn’t know what I wanted but that was the beauty of my life. I didn’t have to make any decisions right now. I was single and allowed to do whatever the hell I wanted.

  “If you don’t want to be with me, just say so. But don’t lie to me. Every woman wants to get married and be taken care of.”

  I sighed. “No. Not all women want the same thing. We don’t have a hive mind. You people always think there has to be something wrong with us if we’re not looking to get married or have children. But I do not want you, at least not anymore. I was having a good time, but I do not want to be committed to you or sail with you or be taken care of by you or take care of you. And I sure as hell don’t want to marry you or anyone else. I like my life just the way it is.”

  Luckily, we hadn’t departed from the dock. I gathered my things and dashed off the yacht before his words got much meaner. I didn’t need to be beaten down because things hadn’t gone according to his plans.